![]() Or turn our tired thoughts to the always uncertain future, generating baseless fears.īuddhism has a strong position on this type of mental activity: the self is a fiction, and that fiction is the source of all distress. Circling round the concept “I,” we can generate painful backward-looking feelings like guilt or regret. Have you noticed the 3 am thoughts are very self-focused? In the quiet dark, it’s easy to slide unknowingly into a state of extreme egocentricity. Worry is identifying a problem, ruminating about the worst possible outcome and neglecting the resources we would bring to bear should the non-preferred outcome actually occur. We might think we are problem-solving by mentally working over issues at this hour, but this isn’t really problem-solving it’s problem-solving’s evil twin – worry. The truth is, our mind isn’t really looking for a solution at 3 am. We can’t believe the solution of just ringing this person, postponing that thing, or checking such-and-such was overlooked in the wee hours. Once the sun’s up, we’re listening to the radio, chewing our Vegemite toast, and pushing the cat off the bench, and our 3 am problems are put in perspective. The truth is, your brain isn’t really looking for a solution at 3 am. So the mind is partly right when it concludes the problems it’s generated are unsolvable – at 3 am, most problems literally would be. With none of our human skills and capital, we are left alone in the dark with our thoughts. From nature’s viewpoint, this is meant to be a time of physical and emotional recovery, so it’s understandable that our internal resources are low.īut we also lack other resources in the middle of the night – social connections, cultural assets, all the coping skills of an adult are unavailable at this time. Catastrophizing in the wee hoursĪs a cognitive therapist, I sometimes joke the only thing good about 3 am waking is that it gives us all a vivid example of catastrophizing.Īround this time in the sleep cycle, we’re at our lowest ebb physically and cognitively. There’s also a strong link between sleep and depression, so it’s important to speak to your doctor if you have any concerns about your sleep. If that sounds like you, be aware that insomnia responds well to psychological treatment with cognitive behavioral therapy. Stress also impacts sleep in insomnia, where people become hypervigilant about being awake.Ĭoncerns about being awake when one “should” be asleep can cause the person to jolt themselves into anxious wakefulness whenever they go through a light sleep phase. So if you’re experiencing 3 am wakings at the moment, you’re definitely not alone. Not surprisingly, there is evidence the pandemic is a sleep-disturbing stressor. But add a bit of stress and there is a good chance that waking will become a fully self-aware state. When sleep is going well for us, we are simply unaware of these awakenings. We actually wake up many times each night, and light sleep is more common in the second half of the night. The 3 am thoughts are often distressing, punitive, and painful.
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